Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Fruit of my Labors

My son is 19 months old, and I am going crazy. I’m sure every new mom feels like this. It was so
much easier when he was just crying all the time and I felt like I would die from lack of sleep. Seems funny to say that now. At the time, I thought things couldn’t get worse. But I now know that there are worse things than a major lack of sleep. Such as a toddler who has a mind of his own.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I LOVE being a mom. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. But right now I am not in the reward season – I’m told that comes later in life. I do get some rewards: the hugs I get every morning, the big giggles, the snuggles after his nap, the toothy grin when I read his books. I love that.
Sometimes I would like to see a little fruit from my discipline labors. That seems like it is a long time in coming. Discipline is a constant issue. And it is one that I cannot back down on. I have to win every fight. Sometime I would like to forfeit the fight, to give in. But I know that will make things harder in the long run for me.
This stick-to-it-ivness is not easy. The constant diligence. The consistency. The never wavering, even when all I want to do is give him what he wants, because that would be easier than listening to the crying and whining.
But I can’t. Because you don’t always get what you want in life. It is a lesson we all must learn at some point. Better now than later.
I must learn discipline in my own life. I need to do the laundry when I don’t want to. I need to not eat that yummy lemon bar that has been sitting on my kitchen counter for 4 days (but if my husband doesn’t eat it soon, I will!). I need to get up at 6:00 and get ready for my day, and not wait until my son wakes up first. In getting ready for my day, I need to spend quality time with God, because that is what is important.
Discipline is the opposite of laziness. I could be lazy and not discipline my son, but what kind of wild child would I have then? Probably one that no one wants to be around (and I’ve been around those). So, I need to stick to my discipline, of my son and of myself. It is hard, yes, but it needs to be done.

See also:
Exhaustion and Discipline