Friday, November 19, 2010

Sibling Squabbles

My kids are starting to fight with each other. It is usually the older one taking something from the younger one.
At MOPS yesterday, the speaker addressed the issue of sibling squabbles. She said that once they are verbal, you should be teaching them how to work out their problems. She gave the example of her own kids saying that she was not in a position to figure out who was right or wrong, they needed to figure it out between them, because if they didn't, they would both have consequences. She said that changed their attitudes fast, because if they were both to have consequences, no matter who was wronged, they worked things out quickly, or just forgot about it.
Preschool teachers in Japan rarely intervene in arguments between the children. They observe them to make sure violence doesn't erupt, but they let the children work out the situation between them. And the kids resolve the issues on their own. If one child hits another, the other children show empathy to the hurt one and once peer-pressure gets to the offender, that child will apologize.
I've decided to take a step back from my children's squabbles and see what happens. So far, they have worked out most of the problems on their own. Now, if I can just remember not to step in just because I'm annoyed, this might work!