The Art of "Good Enough"

Do you ever avoid doing something because you know you won't be able to do it perfectly? I often succumb to the thought, well, it's already messed up, so why bother? I'll never get it the way I want it.

I gave up on perfect in my house. That perfect picture in the magazine took hours to set up. And it's not reality. Perfect is an illusion. Perfect is fleeting. Perfect is unattainable.

"Good Enough" is the new "Perfect". As soon as one item gets put out of place, perfect is ruined. When the room is good enough, that one item out of place is no longer ruining anything. It's good enough.

Good enough means that the room is clean enough to have company over. Good enough means that there is dust on the table, but the toys are not on the couch where the guests sit. Good enough means that laughter runs around the house chasing more laughter with a lightsaber. Good enough means that I am not stressing about the crumbs in the corner of the kitchen but concentrating on making my friends feel comfortable in my home.

I would prefer to make my tomato sauce totally from scratch, starting with fresh tomatoes. The only problem is, using fresh tomatoes doubles the time it takes me to make the sauce. So, I aim for good enough instead of perfect and use canned tomatoes, along with frozen and fresh vegetables. I still control the ingredients, the amount of salt, adding more veggies than most store brand sauces have. It is good enough. It's not my ideal, but it will do.

Good enough means that I sometimes buy stuff that I could make. For instance, I know I can make a good pie crust. It's not that difficult, and I usually have all the ingredients on hand. However, it is time consuming. And I would just rather spend the money on a ready made pie crust and spend my time doing something I deem more worth while.

Let go of Perfect. Perfect will always let you down.

Embrace Good Enough, and you can always achieve your goal.

Personalize this: What Perfect are you holding on to that could be Good Enough? What stresses in your life can you get rid of by letting Good Enough be your aim? What guilt can you let go of by replacing Perfect with Good Enough?

Take it to my kids: Kids aren't Perfect, and never will be. When your kid does a chore, don't follow behind and "fix" it, because that just tells them what they did wasn't good enough. When my 5-year old folded the facecloths, it took much willpower for me to not straighten out the corners. She did a good job folding, and I just had to realize that she worked hard on it. It wasn't Perfect, but it was Good Enough. Give your kids grace and let them be Good Enough.

Is Your Housekeeping Keeping People From Coming Over?

"I feel like I can't ever get my house clean enough for people to come over."

The words she spoke broke my heart. And I bet a lot of you can identify with that.

This isn't about how to get a clean house. This is about your attitude about your house and your insecurities about yourself.

Ask yourself these questions: Am I embarrassed to have people over because they might see an imperfect house? Am I basing my self-worth on how clean my house is? When I go to a friend's house, do I inspect it for flaws? If so, why? If there are dishes on the counter do you secretly smirk within yourself because her house isn't perfect?

Or do you notice the dishes on the sink and sigh with relief because now you know that she isn't perfect, just like you are not perfect, and then never think about the dishes again?

If you are so concerned about what other people think of you and your housekeeping skills, you will never open your heart to invite people to really know you. The worst thing that ever happened to the modern household is magazines and TV shows that pretend to portray what a house "should" look like.

Let us, as women, stand united and support each other and say, "I don't care what your house looks like, I like YOU for who you are, not where you live." Holding on to an unreachable image of what the perfect house looks like will ruin your ability to show hospitality.

Lately I've seen many an article ranting about how the airbrushed images of celebrities and models have ruined the healthy self-image women have of themselves; and how we shouldn't compare our bodies to the fake bodies in the advertisements. What Photoshop has done to the female body is the same thing that magazines have done to the home: made an unreachable ideal. I have three kids. My house is NEVER going to look like a magazine cover. Nor would I ever want it to. As soon as my house is spotless, that means that no one is living in it, or else I have turned into a monster that does nothing but nag my family to clean up after themselves.

The underlying problem is contentedness. Be content in who you are as a person, not as a housekeeper. Be content with what you have: a place to live in and a family that lives in it.

Be content knowing that imperfect is okay; because any person who decides who you are based on how your house looks is not worthy to be your friend.

Don't ostracize people just because you feel like your house isn't perfect. A real friend will love you in spite of your flaws, and maybe even because of your flaws. Your self worth should not hinge on what YOU think other people think of you. Your self worth should hinge on the fact that God made you who you are and you are beautiful in his eyes.

We all have flaws. Don't let your flaws keep you from enjoying your friends in your house. Don't shut people out because they might see a little bit of the real you. If you want to nurture friendships, be real. And I can't imagine anything more real than my house after a long day at home with three little kids.